Hold onto yourself

A man embarks on an arduous trek up to the top of a mountain in search of the secret to lasting happiness.  Upon finding the appropriate Guru he is informed the path to lasting happiness involves poverty, deprivation, abstinence and celibacy.  To which the man responded, "is there anyone else I can speak to?"

It’s human nature to want to avoid suffering and seek out a more comfortable solution.  To understand who we are and to make peace with our personality can be one of the greatest struggles in our lifetime.  

So why bother?  Well you don’t have to. It is a choice to delve into the depths of your psyche, one that more and more people are choosing to make.  Its rewards are literally liberating.  For example, a new frame of mind can unlock your potential, unshackle your invisible chains and free your mind to access new realms of possibility and potential which can impact anywhere from the boardroom to your bedroom! 

Ultimately we all want greater happiness and this begins within.  It’s a personal journey as long and challenging as any mountain trek.  And as any mountaineer would agree, it’s not about mastering the mountain; it’s about mastering yourself so you can reach the top.  To control your internal workings means you can relax and enjoy the scenery no matter what the weather or terrain.  Mastering our mind controls our experiences in life. 

David Scharch in his book, The Passionate Marriage talks about ‘Holding on to yourself’.  I think this is a brilliant phase, one we can all relate to and should embrace.  He believes to hold on to yourself involves self-mastery and self-control.  Whereby you must learn about yourself, confront yourself then move to a space of self validation and self soothing.  I think Carl Jung sums this experience up perfectly "To become acquainted with oneself is a terrible shock."  However, if you are someone who needs to lead an authentic and powerful life, getting to know yourself (warts and all) is the key to greater happiness. 

So to use the term ‘hold on to yourself’ is quite accurate if you are willing to undertake the exhilarating roller coaster ride of uncovering the delights of the mission control centre; your mind.  To hold on to yourself means to remember you are human, you are vulnerable, fragile as well as being powerful beyond measure.  Confusing isn’t it! 

Here are five tips to help reveal your path to greater happiness and remember, hold on to yourself as there is no where to run.  Mastery of your mind is the key to personal freedom and happiness.  No one said it was going to be easy but the rewards of greater happiness both internally and externally will leave a spring in your step, a smile on your face and a knowingness that you are on your path. 

1) Recognise the best in you. 
Become acquainted with the best in you or your higher self.  Let your higher self do the thinking, listening and most importantly the speaking.  If you can hold yourself accountable to being the best you can be, you will evoke others around you tap into their higher self too. 

2) Make your ‘lower self’ redundant.   
By striving to live by your best qualities, your worst will automatically want a piece of the action.  Negative thoughts and emotions will demand your attention in order to survive.  By recognising this and letting them go, you are giving up your lower self and committing to greater happiness. 

3)  Get the lesson once and for all. 
If you have a persistent complaint in your life, one that keeps coming back to haunt you, for goodness sake confront it once and for all and move on with your life.  Give the complaint a purpose, make it worthy of teaching you a lesson, learn it then DROP IT.  Without this, you will be carrying an unhappy aspect of your present in to your future.

4)  Being your own best friend. 
Write a list of things you love to do, things that nurture your soul and bring you back to yourself.  Commit to working through this list and give it the priority it deserves.  This will help you cope and hold on to yourself during adverse times. 

5)  Be light! 
Humour is a tool used by the wise.  To take yourself lightly allows you to see life for what it is.  Train your brain to seek out the humour in life, it will keep you in good spirits to overcome challenging obstacles.

I am a proud new mother.  At no other time in my life have I truly had to step up my game.  Although motherhood really is no game. It’s a submission.  Being a life coach has helped me transition from a vibrant, ambitious and admittedly self-indulgent woman into a sleep deprived, love struck, humbled and more grateful human being.  If I had known what motherhood fully entailed many years ago I would have been torn between starting straight away and running for the hills.  Luckily my coaching knowledge provided a tool kit for awareness and understanding of how to turn those moments of exhausted challenge into a focused strategy for greater love and compassion.

© Claire Hall & Authentic Empowerment.